I posted this back in August. I've been thinking about this again, so I figured I'd repost it for my new readers to share their feelings on this topic. Bon apetit!
I dont actually remember how this topic popped into my mind, but the other day while driving home from work, I started mentally compiling a list of "the little things" that I would want from a man in a relationship.
We all have our major must-haves when it comes to getting involved with a significant other. Mine consist of
- someone who is funny and silly
as much as I love to laugh and have fun, I cannot stomach somoene who is dry and boring..we wont get past the 1st date
- someone who is goal oriented/has a plan.
I cant deal with a lazy negro content with a part time job at the movies or McDonald's
- being honest...if you lie over little things in the beginning, then you'll lie over big things in the end.
Included in this is when people act suspicious. Don't give me a reason to even question what you tell me and we'll be cool.
Okay, of course I have a zillion more must haves (could be the reason I dont have a man), but that was just a few examples of what my "man" can't be without.
However, we all know there are a few characteristics that we desire in a potential mate that arent neccessarily important, but will give them extra points and push them from bench rider to starting point guard on your team once you get to know them a little bit better. You know, the things that you can live without, but if he or she does it or has it, you'll smile even wider when you see them walk through the door. We'll call these, "the little things".
For some women, it might be that he calls you every morning just to hear your voice. For some men, it might be that she has pretty toes. lol
The "little things" that I would love for a man to do:
- if I wake up in the middle of the night, I can call him and he'll wake up to talk.
Since I'm a night owl, it would be great if he was, too (hell, just look at the time that I posted this blog. And I'll probably be up a few more hours). I know that people have to get up in the morning and blah blah blah which is why this is a want, and not a need in the relationship department. I'm just one of those people who doesnt get energy until after 11p, so it would be great if my "man" could keep up with me on that level on a regular basis (meaning not just on the weekend).
- I love to read, so it would be great if he did too.
This is something I should probably ask Santa for because I have NEVER been involved with a guy who loves to read, no matter how smart he is. I think it would just be great to discuss literature with a man who I'm in love with, or head on down to Starbucks on a rainy Saturday or a lazy Sunday with a paperback to chill and just read. I know that sounded corny and square as hayle, but hello? Thats me. It's simply a wish AND a prayer.. lol Are there any of you out there?
- Someone with lots of siblings.
Okay, this has nothing to do with their personality (well actually it does, especially depending on the order in which they were born, but my reasoning for it has nothing to do with that psychological stuff), but it has everything to do with family planning.
I'm not over the hill, but I am at the age when any relationship I enter in needs to be heading toward something. And that something needs to be marriage (typing that just scared me *shudder*).
Most of ya'll know I'm an only child. And I want my kids to have ainties and uncles (not aunts, but ainties). So therefore, I'd prefer future boyfriend aka future husband aka future baby daddy aka REGGIE BUSH, to have two sisters and two brothers, and for him to not be the oldest, youngest or middle child (is that asking for me too much?).
- and lastly, it would be great if he had friends.
I have friends...lots of them, but everyone isnt as blessed in that department, so its not a requirement. It just sucks when a guy trips about you spending time with friends. Or if he doesnt mind, but you feel guilty anyway because while you're out having a ball with myspace pics to prove it, he's at home bored watching the "Fresh Prince" marathon on Nick at Nite waiting on you and being suspicious about every little thing you did while out. Who wants that in their life? Not I, said Nakia.
So yeah, those are just a few of "the little things" that would make a man that much more special. Wish me luck on finding a man who possesses those qualities, while I work to make myself a better woman who will attract this kind of man.
Think about "the little things" and let me know what you have in mind.
India Arie - Little Things
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