D'Angelo is Back and David Banner Better Step His Game Up

In recent years, D'Angelo had fallen to the way side like a pair of kitten heels worn by a 58 year old street walker named Gladys from Kentucky who smokes Newports and rocks glittery eyelashes with a knife wound on her chin.

His transformation from

Fall-To-Ya-Knees FINE

to

Call the Po-Po

was enough to make a thug like me cry.

I was merely a freshman in college when D'Angelo's rippling, shining, caramel man parts graced the tv screen in my dorm room thanks to 106th & Park and whatever other music shows used to come on back in 2000. The "How Does It Feel" video was EVERYTHING. He, D'Angelo, was everything, with his piercing wails and seductive mouth quivers. I know I'm not the only who has no idea what he was singing, and never cared enough to find out because the simple video with cool, easy instrumentals was all I needed to enjoy this man.

But even without the "How Does It Feel" video and the Voodoo album it was derived from, D'Angelo was still everything. From "Brown Sugar", "Lady", and every other song on his first album, to his "Nothing Even Matters" duet on Lauryn Hill's Miseducation, the brotha could do no wrong in my eyes.

And then he just disappeared.

And then he reappeared looking like Ronald McDonald's pal, Grimace.

Around that time, I'd read an article in which ?estlove explained D'Angelo's negative reaction to women fawning over him at concerts. Is was as if no one heard his music anymore because all they wanted was his glistening body spinning around in that video. And it got so bad that he had to be pulled out on the stage to perform, resulting in a deep depression and him no longer enjoying the music business.

I don't know how true that is, but if it is true, I can understand a man wanting to be known for his talent instead of his looks. But that doesn't mean stop making music, does it? Get as chubby and disheveled as you want, but don't stop singing to me.

A few months back, D'Angelo reappeared somewhere performing overseas and he looked like he was getting his life together, so my spirits perked up. And when I saw that he was added to this year's Essence Fest in New Orleans, I nearly had a heart attack. Why couldn't he have been there last year when I was there???

Then yesterday, I this picture from the May issue of GQ, and my mouth watered and sweat dampened the bridge of my nose. Lawd, ha' mercy...he is back!!! As @1uppitynegress commented on Instagram: "That brother got that snap back...Cause that body has sho nuff snapped back!!"


So now that he's taking pictures for major magazines and looking sexy, I've had to re-evaluate my entire imaginary love life.

• Where do David Banner and I stand? 
• Yes, I've named my first and second ovaries after him, but how permanent is our love? 
• Should we work it out, or should I move on to a prior love who is finally getting his life together
• D'Angelo loves thick women, as evidenced by his long term relationship with Angie Stone
• He obviously loves to eat which is also my favorite past time
• We're basically a match made in heaven. 
• And his mouth is just... 

Imagine what those lips can do

• But can I give my heart to a grown man who wear cornrows in 2012?

Let me just end this by saying that I am happy D'Angelo is back and I am praying that this new publicity means a U.S. tour is on the way. I don't care if he sings "Mary Had a Little Lamb". I need to see that man in concert before I die!

Are you excited about D'Angelo's return to the public? 
How did you feel about his fall from grace? 
How do you think I should break it off with David Banner?